Hmm? Oh, the title, right. It’s: That One Post Where Jack Climbs Onto His High Horse and Rides Away Into The Sunset With His Fat Head. You know the type of post that’s incoming, dear reader, the type of post where I position myself as a lifestyle guru helping the feeble minded masses understand that they can only make a choice against tradition when I tell them to because I’m special! Buy my Book! Subscribe to my…yeah, you get it, so, no, I’m not doing that. I’m just sharing a little of he work that went into giving myself a peace of mind this holiday season. I’ve attempted the free-from festive route, here if you’re looking to cater to more than one as it’s obviously worthwhile if you’re in charge of the food preparation for everyone, rather than, like Jack, trying to match everyone else single handedly. What am I talking about? Why food! FOOD! That seems to be all this holiday means to most. No, no, I’m not getting theological here, it’s just food has become the all encompassing effort this time of year and I’m here to tell you that it really doesn’t need to be. That alone won’t help against the societal pressure to conform, but let’s look at this idea and flesh it out a bit.
Marvelling at junk-food and the wizard behind the curtain. This was just a reminder of what I meant to say here, but it is fitting. Look, junk-food is junk, I don’t care how companies try to sell us on it, I’ve been in the thick of it, literally, you don’t weigh what I used to by abstaining, now I’m so far removed it’s like a distant dream. The thing about junk-food, hence to be known as trash, is that it’s deceptive, until you know how something is made you just can’t imagine all the fat and sugar that goes into even the smallest treat, couple that with all the preservatives and additives that comes in trash then I feel ill thinking about that. Your brain and companies conspire together to get you hooked, fats and sugar paired are deviously addictive, companies using the fear of missing out (FOMO) then make you feel as if this Christmas was the only time you can eat: Whatever. Realising that ignoring this part is vastly better for you regardless of your food issues is part of the path to just enjoying the holidays.
Binging? This is binging! Again, fitting. You might be thinking of a few artisanal mince pies, a sip of brandy, my my, dear reader, how pretentious you are! Not like humble, Jack, ‘umble Jack even. But here’s the thing: You can’t be sure what extreme is when it comes to food. Different people have different requirements, they also have different thresholds. You might be satisfied with a little cookie, a nice meal and nothing more but to someone who like I was, am still in a way, who just can’t stop. Who will eat until they’re ill chasing that supposed satisfaction. Here’s a clue: It doesn’t exist. Food will not make the holidays better, but it can cause trouble for you for the rest of the year and the future. So, for me I’ll have some turkey, I’ll have it with my vegetables, my own gravies, I’ll enjoy it, but I won’t have anything out of the norm. No junk-food, no extra pilings of meat and vegetables, nothing I don’t need. And, you know what? I’ll be better and happier for it. When the fad diets come in I’ll be eight years at this and will have never stumbled. Why? Because I know what I’m doing works, I know what’s in my food and I know how to eat plenty, but never the wrong things.
So, you’re saying now what, right? I have dashed the plate from your grubby hands, dear reader, the gravy has been upturned and is soaking into the carpet already sodden with the tears of…what? Shut up and get to the point? How rude! Fine. Remember that it isn’t food-mas it’s not even a religious holiday if you’d rather it not be. I don’t celebrate it that way. It’s a time to remember to think of family and fiends, which should be every month, but we’re all idiots in that regard. Yesterday I watched my nephew marvel at the magical elf that has taken up residence in our house, he’s eight and his innocence is the greatest gift of all. His sisters keeping the illusion going for him the second greatest. There’s so much more to this than food, but it is so very hard to break away from that. For those who can dip, but not drown, good for you, but remember those who can’t. Support them in their choices because it really is just one day, but a mistake made then may be detrimental for many, many more days. Okay, I’ll leave you with Charles, the Dabbing Elf.