I’m not even sure where to begin with this, it’s funny, I read a lot (Probably too much) and have a decent vocabulary, but when it comes to laying my thoughts down it all gets muddled and words seem to fail me, I guess it’s still a lot to process, even years later. I’ll try to make this simple and succinct, hopefully you’ll bare with me to the end.
Yup, this is yours truly. Sorry if it shatters any illusions. As Popeye once said: I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam.
Firstly, I guess I should say where I’m currently at in my weight loss journey. I’m now at one whole year of no weight fluctuations or one year stable as I think of it. Prior to that it was two and a half years of losing weight and changing my entire diet to lose nearly 10 stone, about 137 pounds. That’s by no means a small number and this was done without any surgeries or any fad diets. Heck I never even set foot in a gym, it’s been food that’s been my downfall and now it’s the sword that’ll carve a new path forward for me. I did it mostly alone, I have a supportive family, but it’s also been my own will that’s kept me going, ultimately it’s going to be on you, no one else can do this for you. I’m now waiting on multiple surgeries to fix the damage that the weight-loss has caused because no one can do everything. First up will be the stomach and my diastasi recti, which is where the abdominal muscles separate. Don’t think about it too much, I try not to. I’m really lucky in that I will be able to get all the surgeries covered by my medical card. It’ll be a long wait, but I do realise how lucky I am. Now that may all sound scary and it is, but I tell you the damage that your body has already endured from being vastly overweight which you only understand after the loss is even more chilling.
So this probably sounds really negative, right? Yeah, it’s harsh and raw and real. Take it from me, fads and magical pills, snake oils and cure-alls don’t do anything. This will be the hardest thing you’ll ever do, it’ll also be the greatest accomplishment of your life and each year it stays off will be another feather in your cap, even if it’s only you that recognises it as such. It’s somewhere between going cold turkey from drugs (I spent a few months with my stomach and brain begging for food) and becoming famous (The attention it brings can be overwhelming and somewhat addictive). I do feel that it’s my responsibility to always spell all this out so as not to endanger someone else’s healthy and well being. I changed everything I ate, I discovered intolerances and allergies and I dragged myself from a personal hell, as clichéd as that is it’s extremely apt. If you can take all that in and still want to go on your own journey then you’ll be fine, but if you still believe in the hype and non-sense that’s being spouted ubiquitously, then you’ll struggle. Take it from me, I’ve been through everything you could imagine and some things I don’t think I could ever even formulate the words for, there’s no easy way.
I suppose the big question is how did I do it. That’s a loaded question, it’d take days to explain and even then I think people make assumption from false ideas gleamed from the media. I can’t tell you how many incredulous looks I’ve gotten from saying I just started eating right. Even if you followed my methods you’d probably end up somewhere else entirely. I should mention when I went in for my consultation about the skin I was asked if I was banded, I honestly couldn’t think what the doctor meant at first, he meant a gastric band. At that point I think it hit hard how much I had accomplished. This was my path, it’s not one every could, or should, follow or even one that could be boiled down to it essence and applied to their lives. You need to find your own way to a better you, it’s scary, it’ll be sadly all too probable that most people will just fall back into old habits because it’s all to easy to. For me I’ve never stopped moving forwards for every stone lost I cut down on food, I added new healthier foods, better habits (That’s the cornerstone of all this: Habit) and learned everything I could possibly about what I was eating, because this isn’t about starvation it’s about nutrition and balance in all things. If you’ve read these blog then you know I still love my treats. This is more than one blog post could ever encapsulate. Perhaps someday I’ll offer some help to others in a clear and concise guide, but for now I’m still getting my own head together.
So here I am, one year after the scales stopped moving, when I broke down and cried because it was two and a half years of so much blood, sweat and tears. I probably haven’t put down anywhere near what I wanted, but I felt I should share it, not to brag, because sometimes I wonder if I’ve done enough, silly I know, but that’s me, but because it makes people realise that you can do this. I did it, someone who knew nothing about food or celiac disease, nightshade intolerance or anything of their ilk. If you think it stops, that once the weight goes everything magically comes up smelling of roses then you’ll fail, I’m sorry to be harsh, but it’s true, but if you can accept this is for life then you’ll be able to start building a foundation for your future happiness that’ll stand the test of time. It’s almost surreal how miserable being overweight can make you and how much you’ll endure never realising how much better it can be. I’m healthier than I’ve ever been and in a better place than I ever thought I could be.
Another year and the fat days get a little further away, I’ve still got a long way to travel. Surgeries await and there’s still a whole world out there that seems hell-bent on loading our food with allergies and nasty stuff, but I’ve just got to keep going and remember I’ve been through worse. If you’ve read all that and think: Well I can’t do what he did, then remember this one simple thing: I thought I wasn’t the kind of person who could do it either and look at me now.
Thanks for reading this.